I need your advice about my mother's problem.....?

My mother is 75 and since I remember she used to provoke jeoulsy between her children to force them to do things that she wanted....For example if my brother wouldn't study she would tell him how my sister was good at school.and if my sister was not obeying what she wanted she would tell her how wise and mature my brother was and if I was naughty she would tell how my brother and sister were and would never do such a things I were doing.....well the result is that none of the children have good relationship with each other and of course with her now....although she was a wonderful mother and was very caring and had sacrifised everything in her life for the sake of her children....even now when she wants something from me she does the same thing she first admires my brother or my sister in front of me because of what she desires and then she asks me what she wants me to do.she is old and fragile now ...so what can I do when I get angry with this?I need your advice about my mother's problem.....?
Do we know each other ?You are describing my mom to boot.They are manipulators.Do only what you can for herI need your advice about my mother's problem.....?
My grandmother is that way. I thought about it one day and I came to this conclusion: She probably ain't gonna change and I'll just have to accept it. As hard as that sounds, ya know, she's in her golden years and I wouldn't want her to leave me on bad terms. Don't let this put a cleft between you all. Try to focus more on the good times with each other.
Forgive %26amp; forget it it's in the past.Deal with it %26amp; move on.
“And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], ';uff,'; and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.” [Quran 17: 23]





“And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.” [Quran 31:14]





“…No mother should be harmed through her child, and no father through his child…” [Quran 2: 233]





';…My Lord and Sustainer! Be kind and have mercy on them as they cherished, nurtured and sustained me in childhood.” [Quran 17: 24]





Once a companion asked the Prophet as to whom he should show more kindness. The Prophet replied: ';Your mother.'; He asked who comes next and the Prophet again replied: ';Your mother.'; He asked the Prophet yet again who comes next. The Prophet replied: “Your mother.'; When the companion asked for the fourth time, only then did the Prophet reply: ';Your father.';
Start comparing her to other mothers who would never do such a thing.
Since you already knew your mother from the very first start I suggest you just keep it astride and don't get jealous and pityful, remember your mom is already in his twilight years any moment or time now she will be called by our maker. So there will be no more mom to talk too or see.





Just imagine the good things you two do when you are still a child, regardless of what she does to any of your sister or brother, she is just a good story teller to make each and every one of you to move on and strive hard in this life. In other words she challenge you all to think for yourself because in the end she will be gone and will be just brothers and sisters, that is what's life is all about. Think positive not just dwell on the past, we can never returned to the past but definitely look up for the future. Will you still dwell in the past?
She learnt how to manipulate you all and it worked! You should do only what you can since you already know that this is her method of getting things done. There is no point in being jealous or trying to outdo your siblings, you're all adults with your own lives so it's petty to let it carry on. If you get angry with her about it, instead of blowing up or sulking, just laugh and say in a jocular way that you learnt long ago that she tries to 'trick' you into doing things and then say what you are able to do and will do depending on her request. She may not do it next time...
what can you do? except dont repeat the cycle with your own children ..we learn from our experiences and i bet your kids will have a great relationship with eachother but they will resent you for other reasons ,no one is a perfect parent and there are no model children ..thank your mom for doing her best and hope that you can do yours...and think of all the great things she told your siblings about you......learn to forgive