Need advice about dating a younger man .. ??

I have a younger boyfriend, early 20's, ( I'm in my 30's) and while he is very sweet, and attentive, and affectionate, he is also kinda selfish because a long time girlfriend broke his heart, and he has up this brick wall, he is also really cheap with money. he claims that he is not used to buying flowers and gifts for women, or spending money for dates.


So is this typical for a guy his age ? should I give him time to learn to open up, and be more giving, or should I just move on, and date someone closer to my age that already has the experience with women ?Need advice about dating a younger man .. ??
He sounds immature...he is not use to buying flowers and gifts for women, or spending money for dates??? Are you serious? What a lame *ss excuse for not wanting to spend a little money on you.....If I were you...I would move on.....It really isn't so much the age difference...as it is the age difference at this particular time in his life.





By the way...there is 7 years difference between my hubby and I....I am 41 and he is 34.....we met when he was 32.....I think a man in his 20's is too young for a woman in her 30's....because they tend to be immature.....Need advice about dating a younger man .. ??
Well, I'd say that the selfishness is common in 20-somethings.


The ';brick wall'; is a person-to-person thing that can change over time.





The cheap with money is definitely a person-to-person thing that will likely NOT change. If you want him spending his money on you (what are your economics like? Do you make more money than he? Do you expect him to buy all the time?) and he won't do it, I don't think that's going to change, even if he's 30 and you're 45.
This isn't an age thing - this is a personality thing. (I got married at 30 to a 23 year old man.) Your boyfriend sounds like a LOSER. Whenever guys blame their behavior on a previous breakup that is a PROBLEM! They should never be selfish and they should never be cheap. Conservative possibly, but never stingy. Typical behavior for a guy in his 20s is to spoil you rotten and worship the ground you walk on.





I definitely suggest that you MOVE ON - but don't think you need an older guy. Once a guy hits his 20s, age doesn't necessarily determine who is more mature. My husband is way more mature than all my ex boyfriends who were in their 30s. By then it's just personality traits - who is loving, generous, kind, and focused on you. Again, whenever a man has to tell you about his prevous relationships and if he ever makes himself out to be the victim - WALK AWAY. You don't ever want a man who whines and/or who doesn't take full responsibility for his actions and choices. That leads to another big heap of trouble.
Two part answer. Part one - If you had your heart broken would you jump back into another relationship with someone and be totally trusting of that person? The male ego is a fragile thing. No matter how tough we appear to be on the outside we're soft and mushy on the inside. Talk to him, show him you're on his side but don't push to hard. He will come around if you let him feel secure with you. Part two - What is typical? I don't think there is such a thing. And why is it important that he spend money? Some of the best dates I've had were walking hand in hand along a beach, flying a kite together, building a sand castle, feeding stale bread to the ducks, etc. It's not how much you spend it's who you spend the time with that's important. Anyone can throw a bunch of money around and buy a good time but it takes a real man to make a good time. Also let me suggest that you chip in half the time. Your getting half the enjoyment out of being together, why not foot half the expense? He might just be a little cautious these days and not want to break the bank if he's just going to get hurt again. If he's sweet, attentive and affectionate it sounds like he's a pretty cool guy. I'm surprised you'd even consider tossing him aside. Oh...having experience with women usually only creates bad habits. Learn and grow together...the fun is in the journey not the destination. Above all else talk. Do not judge, just talk.
Advice about dating a man in his 20's......dont do it.





I am 23 and had literally increased the minimum age to 30 about a year ago after all the guys within my age range were huge disappointments. They all wanted to party or hang with the guys every other night, get stupidly drunk, and had no idea what romance was. Granted, there is that rare gem in rough that may a great guy-but I couldn't find him. The main guy that I dated for six years actually was probably the worst. He sounds exactly like the guy that you are with. Funny thing was-when we first started dating when I was 14 and all the way up until he was about 21 (legal drinking age) he was a great guy. He spoiled me and was affectionate....then all of a sudden it was like a light switch was flipped and he turned into this....well, idiot. He was too cheap to take me to dinner, but going out with the boys every other night to the bar and dropping a $100 every time was no big deal.





I suggest to move on. If he really loves you and cares, it might take you leaving to make him step up to the plate and mature.
if this is the only fault in the relationship then I suggest try working with him a little bit on this subject/issue
Honestly? I don't think there is a future in this relationship. At the end of the day, you two are going at different speeds. I dated a younger guy when I was 34 he was 26 - it just doesn't work. Its ok if you just want a bit of fun for a short time, but if you're looking for a long term partner, its a no-no; its too unstable; people often change a lot between 20 and 30. Ultimately, you are investing into a r/ship that is almost certainly going to end. Can you afford to waste several years on an emotional dead end? He will get to a point where he wants someone younger. I think he has also turned to you because he wants a certain safety and security after the last r/ship and very often guys choose an older woman when things have gone wrong in their love lives; it happened to me. Ultimately, in my case, he went back to his ex.





The years pass very quickly; do you want to still be single in 3 or 5 years time assuming it lasts that long? If it doesn't look like it will last that long, what's point in any event? I would strongly advise moving on. The money thing is just a side issue..
yea my boyfriend was like that also he doesnt like spending money on women but dates he spend money...but my boy is only a year younger than i am...give him time and eventually he will change how long you two have been goin out anyways?? my boy change on our first month monthsary...:p give him time and he will change...but it depends how long you two have been going out?!?
I say if u stay with the man ur dating now ur gonna have to have patients with him form what ur saying he has a brick wall up from his past if ur willing to wait thats fine but remember he can also use his ex as an excuse for the he acts just get him self out of trouble and spending money