I need advice about this?

i am 17 and last year i was raped and i got pregnant from it but then i had a miscarriage shortly after finding out sometimes i cant help but wonder if i gave birth what would the baby have been like would it be a boy or a girl would i have been a good mother should i have given it up for adoption should i have had an abortion if i i didnt miscarry if i needed help would someone have given it to me someone please tell me is this normal to ask myself these kinds of questionsI need advice about this?
Yes Yes Absolutely Yes!! This was your baby!! Irregardless, he/she was still a part of YOU! For goodness sakes, you were pregnant! As a mother, how could you not?? Wouldn't you suppose, that if that child could look into your eyes, that he/ or she, would want to know their own mother loved them, anyways? If for no other reason, than BECAUSE you were their mother?? Of course you would! In the same way, why should it be natural for a mother to feel any less love for her unborn child who was lost,or broken off, than any other mothers love?? Your love is just as grand and worthy as ANY mothers love for a lost child's would be. Your heart breaks just as deeply inside.-maybe even more so. That's why you have all these questions on your mind. And it only goes to show me, that you would have been a WONDERFUL mother!! Otherwise, you would'nt even care. It's ok, my dear, it only means you care. That innocent child, had nothing whatsoever to do, with that one horrible act. And you know, they would have loved you, just the same.....................I need advice about this?
yes its normal, but try not to allow yourself to ponder these thoughts, no good can come of it, be glad that you're safe and healthy with your whole life ahead of you. whatever happened in the past cannot be changed for better or worse
totally norm to ask yourself these questions, but think of it this way. if you were meant to have this child then you would not miscarried. someone up there had a better plan for you right then. keep up the positive things in your life %26amp; someday when your ready it will happen. good luck with your future and make a difference.
Yes, it is normal





After all, Humans are not friggin robots.
I'm praying for you!





Understanding miscarriage


Miscarriage is heartbreaking. It might help to understand possible causes and treatment options, as well as what to expect for the future.


Miscarriage is a relatively common experience — but that doesn't make it any easier. Ending a pregnancy without a baby to hold in your arms is heartbreaking. Take a step toward emotional healing by understanding what can cause a miscarriage, what increases the risk and what medical care might be needed.





What is a miscarriage?


Miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy without obvious cause before the 20th week. About 15 percent of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). But the actual number is probably much higher because many miscarriages occur so early in pregnancy that a woman doesn't even know she's pregnant.


Most miscarriages occur before the 12th week of pregnancy.





Signs and symptoms include:


·Vaginal spotting or bleeding


·Pain or cramping in your abdomen or lower back


·Fluid or tissue passing from your vagina


Keep in mind that spotting or bleeding in early pregnancy is fairly common. In most cases, women who experience light bleeding in the first trimester go on to have successful pregnancies. Sometimes even heavier bleeding doesn't result in miscarriage.





After a Miscarriage: Surviving Emotionally


http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnan…





Some helpful websites that deal with miscarriage and pregnancy loss include:


·http://www.nationalshareoffice.com


·http://www.mend.org


·http://www.aplacetoremember.com


·http://www.madisonfoundation.org


· http://www.pain-heartache-hope.com


· http://www.angelsinheaven.org


· http://www.babyloss.com


· http://www.miscarriagesupport.org.nz





About miscarriage:


http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/miscarr…


http://www.healthsystem.virginia.edu/uva…


http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/…


http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/diseases/fact…
the same thing happened to my mom.


and that was how i was born.


i blame myself for her death alot.


but its a blessing really cause you dont wont a kid to no there mom was raped and they feel like a mistake there whole life and there father is never around.


and when stuff happens it happens for a reason.


god is with you.


look on the positive side=]]]


everything will be ok.
How awful that you had to experience such a terrible trauma and at such a young age. I think you should look into getting some counseling to help you deal with this horrific experience.





Its really important for your well-being.
STOP thinking about it.


You miscarried .. which means something was wrong with the fetus.


It's over .. try not to think about it and move on with your life.


Get counseling for the rape .. but dont keep thinking about that miscarriage. . that baby wasn't meant to be.


It doesn't matter if it was a boy or a girl. Or if you would have aborted it or kept it.


God has the big picture ..and God made the decision so you wouldn't have to, and give you the chance to possibly make the wrong decision and then spend the rest of your life grieving over it.


At least you didn't abort it .. then you could have blames yourself .. but miscarriages happen, there is NOTHING you can do to prevent them. God did what he knew was best.


God has a plan .. if he had meant for that baby to be here .. then that baby would be here. Instead, that baby is in Heaven with God .. getting the best parenting it could get. Please dont worry about ';what if's'; .. there are no ';what if's'; .. its over. Try to move on with your life.


But, please get couseling for your rape. You are very young and you need couseling for that. The rape was NOT your fault .. and you need to find a support group.





good luck! God bless!